Bahasa Melayu can be very funny

Since the Malaysian government has put Bahasa Malaysia/Melayu as the educational language by 2010 instead of English, I feel BM, is not all that bad. Its because that we have more incapable teachers who disgrace English and ruin our education system than good quality teachers, not because of BM..In fact, I have this sent from my mom by email that proves that BM can be both fun and funny..hahaha =)

Murid : Selamat pagi, cikgu.

Cikgu : (Menengking) Mengapa selamat pagi sahaja? Petang dan malam awak doakan saya tak selamat?

Murid : Selamat pagi, petang dan malam cikgu!

Cikgu : Panjang sangat! Tak pernah dibuat oleh orang! Kata selamat sejahtera! Senang dan penuh bermakna. Lagipun ucapan ini meliputi semua masa dan keadaan.

Murid : Selamat sejahtera cikgu!

Cikgu : Sama-sama, duduk! Dengar sini baik-baik. Hari ini cikgu nak uji kamu semua tentang perkataan berlawan. Bila cikgu sebutkan perkataannya, kamu semua mesti menjawab dengan cepat, lawan bagi perkataan-perkataan itu, faham?

Murid : Faham, cikgu!

Cikgu : Saya tak mahu ada apa-apa gangguan.

Murid : (senyap)

Cikgu : Pandai!

Murid : Bodoh!

Cikgu : Tinggi!

Murid : Rendah!

Cikgu : Jauh!

Murid : Dekat!

Cikgu : Keadilan!

Murid : UMNO!

Cikgu : Salah!

Murid : Betul!

Cikgu : Bodoh!

Murid : Pandai!

Cikgu : Bukan!

Murid : Ya!

Cikgu : Oh Tuhan!

Murid : Oh Hamba!

Cikgu : Dengar ini!

Murid : Dengar itu!

Cikgu : Diam!

Murid : Bising!

Cikgu : Itu bukan pertanyaan, bodoh!

Murid : Ini ialah jawapan, pandai!

Cikgu : Mati aku!

Murid : Hidup kami!

Cikgu : Rotan baru tau!

Murid : Akar lama tak tau!

Cikgu : Malas aku ajar kamu!

Murid : Rajin kami belajar cikgu!

Cikgu : Kamu gila!

Murid : Kami siuman!

Cikgu : Cukup! Cukup!

Murid : Kurang! Kurang!

Cikgu : Sudah! Sudah!

Murid : Belum! Belum!

Cikgu : Mengapa kamu semua bodoh sangat?

Murid : Sebab saya seorang pandai!

Cikgu : Oh! Melawan!

Murid : Oh! Mengalah!

Cikgu : Kurang ajar!

Murid : Cukup ajar!

Cikgu : Habis aku!

Murid : Kekal kami!

Cikgu : O.K. Pelajaran sudah habis!

Murid : K.O. Pelajaran belum bermula!

Cikgu : Sudah, bodoh!

Murid : Belum, pandai!

Cikgu : Berdiri!

Murid : Duduk!

Cikgu : Saya kata UMNO salah!

Murid : Kami dengar KeADILan betul!

Cikgu : Bangang kamu ni!

Murid : Cerdik kami tu!

Cikgu : Rosak!

Murid : Baik!

Cikgu : Kamu semua ditahan tengah hari ini!

Murid : Dilepaskan tengah malam itu!

Cikgu : (Senyap dan mengambil buku-bukunya keluar.)

hahaha.. Oh my stomach hurts.. Hahaha. Go BM !!!

Chicken Tales

2 things today. Firstly the ISCF Rally was awesome !! I really had a life changing experience in the form of a wonderful sketch performance about the love of Christ for all and an energetic youth pastor who preaches the gospel that can change eveything.

I thought this rally would be boring but it was so fun. You can sense the presence of God in there and the crowd was crazy. One hiccup was the firework i was tasked to shoot malfunctioned. It was humiliating standing in front of everyone, struggling to make that tube shoot. Fortunatly, only 2 out of 6 worked hehe..Ill remember this for the rest of life as the day i came to knew God WAHOO!!

OK..Secondly, each animal has a unique characters that God created.

1. You may think females are soft and timid, but they can be as brave and independant as males. The chick that Marcus and I thought was fearless and always wondering off on its own, a male, was actually a Female! Its super brave and had characters of a male.Besides that, at an early age of 2 months, the 2 cockarals are nuts over him, I mean.. her
2. In the book "Marley & Me", Mr Gordan says that if a male was left to his own devices without religion or social constraints, a good example is cockarals. And I agree. Chickens mate at least once a day before egg laying, taking any female available. Marcus has only one female and 2 hot blooded males, you can imagine how much attention she gets.
3. Chickens must let the world know an egg was laid or their manlyness. The whole family crooked for a good 5 minutes each time an egg was laid. They even did it at 5.30am on a school day. I wish I can slaughter them but someone treats it as music to his earscough marcus cough"
4. Boxers can be tempted when there are chickens around. But after just a few days, Tyson just ignores them. I saw him sniffing a plant while the chickens just walked away from touching distance, like from Marley in " Marley & Me".He must be bored of them
   

The End

Day of BIRTH..XD

Yesterday i celebrated my friend,megga & my dad's birthday. I prefer Megga's one cuz i had a lot of fun, sorry dad haha..

Before megga's birthday party i went to Shah Alam at 9am and came back at 12pm. I was tired and sleepy when I went to Jusco Bukit Tinggi for the party, but i rather go for this party than stay at home studying or watching tv. I decided i would buy megga a gift so i rushed to look for one. The party starts at 1pm and it was 12.30 !!!

Fortuanatly i was able to purchase a mug( Megga likes planes but there was not a single modal plane in Jusco) and had it wrapped and arrived on time, sweet...

First i met Cher Ee and she went to prepare the surprise.. We( me, Navin, Kuben, Ming Rong, and birthdayboy Megga) choose to eat at Mcdonalds. We laughed at jokes, talked about Parents Day and National service( why was i selected...why..). We talked and then SURPRISE,Yee Ai, Cher Ee, Zhao Yi and Shin Yi came with a lovely black forest cake for Megga. Happy Birthday Megga ...

Only the girls sang which was good enough haha.. Ming Rong gave Megga a shit shaped piggie bank. it was disgustingly cute, and had the correct colour too haha.. Then we played some arcade games and i went back at 3pm to celebrate for my dad's birtday.

My family was supposed to go 1 Utama for my Dad's birthday but mom was tired soo we went to Pyramid instead ..Happy Birthday Dad..That was my first outing with my friends and i'll always remember it as Megga's and dad's day of birth =) Now left navin, me, Yee Ai, Cher Ee...i'm soo excited..

An evil Lurks.. BWAH HA HA...

Alas the female chick died after our funeral trip...

Haiz, I so lazy.. I'm always procastinating whether to do my blog.. This happened on a cold, spooky, and Klangish night. I and Marcus were going to lock the cage at the chicken farm and kiss them goodnight hehe.. As Marcus went to the door,he heard a soft 'chip..chip..' sound. It sounded like a rat..and OMG!!! IT was a rat, a mango sized, grey rat. I pointed the torch at it and it dashed off and dissapeared into a pipe hole..Marcus gave a huge "Gasp" and i was surprise to see a rat in action..

The morning after coming back from my aunt's funeral, I was happily and cozyly sleeping on the sofa after waking up..Then i heard Marcus said " Hey we caught a rat.." I went and see and sure enough there it was, the rat that dissapeared.It was terrified and i felt pity for it but I knew what will happen to it

This creature loves chicken shit and is a disease carrying pest. But as my Dad fill the pail with water and seeing this animal gasping for breath in a cage like Eva Green in the Casino Royale finale, I can't but help feel sorry for it.I saw this before but i was more prepared this time. This spesies killed thousands of people through disease and parisites, and threaten the chickens and sinking its yellow teeths into our food and shitting in our house. Soo as i dropped its lifeless body into the monsoon drain, i said to myself "serve you right you pest.."

Here's the cockarel before becoming an adult


And here they are young alpha males


Chickens bath with sand, interesting.. I think i saw them eating sand too..


We found the female dead between sheets of newspaper. It froze because it went under the
newspapers and was not in contact with the mother's body. Females have a high motality rate in our farm..




Here they are, mother and son sand bathing and roasting in the sun





The chick is scracing itself like Tyson.


I'm so jealous haha..



Even dirty-ol Tyson likes to sand bath haha..



THE END

10 musts in rearing a dog

Before i reared tyson, i wont even dare touch one cuz im scared it will bite me.. But after 2 and a half years of dog rearing, i can even dare touch a barking rottweiler, hehe just kidding. Tyson now is around 2 and half years old and he has thought me many do's and dont's in taking care of dogs especially boxers. Here is the top 10 must's in taking care of this friendly mammal..

1. take it out at least once a week to burn calories and keep him happy and free of trouble
   

Tyson must walk everyday.. so tired. im like his slave being dragged across the neighbourhood without mercy.

2. feed him food at least once a day depending on breed..

Ill feed him chicken. Chicken neck, head, and chicken flavoured 'Pedigree'. Thats why we have a chicken farm at the back haha..


3. always check for ticks, and i mean always..



Sometimes i wonder why God created these little vampires..


4. Always provide clean and fresh water to drink, especially after walks



5. Give your dog a good pat or face rub..

Plastic surgery haha..


But dont over pat him.

6. play with him otherwise he'll look like this dog



7. discipline your dog by tying or something humane



8. Provide something to chew cuz dogs have hyperactive jaws

Tyson's favourite is garden gloves..

9. Look him in the eye and smile..



what?

10. Most of all just love him as your doggie friend..

There, have i convience you to rear dogs.. If i hadnt ill make you hehe, evil laugh...

A dark creature is lurking in the chicken farm, ready to strike.....

...to be continued

Time to Samba and PaRtY !!!

The chicks, my mom calls them cottonballs bcuz well they look just like cottonballs with legs haha.. have nearly doubled in size in just 1 week. Man are those little chicken cells having a mitosis party haha..

Arghh, i MADE a very stupid mistake in my bio paper 3. I was instructed to find a rise in a reading by subtracting the final reading with the initial reading.. I was so smug and high spirit after the test.. "Never trust your mind". i just lost at least 15 marks stupidly

"Eh, did u subtract the initial reading with the final reading" said sherran.
"Yeah.. i did.. WAIT! What must subtract ?!"
"neh, the first question bout the visking tube"sherran explained.
thinking..thinking.." OMG, wHaT the @#$%, you are suppose to subtract it !!"
"Hey u oso didnt subtract ah.." said the swimmer Chow Kuan
"u too!! ahhh.., High five bro.."

O well, exams are not that important, SPM is my ultimate goal.=)

Now i can sit back, watch tv and the upcoming 'Termintor Salvation' movie xD..

psss.. u 4got u still hav tution homework, add maths and art project to finish...

The end for now..

The World's chicken population increased by 2

Picture of the week

I'm reporting from My bro, Marcus's free range chicken farm where a new life cycle has just begun.

A lot has happen to the chickens since last year December when Marcus got the chance to rear kampung chickens from my aunt..One problem rearing chickens is that they live to shit... My mom have to clean the back full of their droppings. Fortunately i & mom build an enclosure to keep them away from the back kitchen..

Alas i knew one day one of them would be eaten by the evil useless animal known as cats..I hate cats cuz they kill innocent chicks. sometimes nature is just cruel 3(..One the female chick got eaten one night when the gang were up on a tree..Some even flew to my neighbour's side in their frighten state.. Now theres only 2 chicks left, pity...

Mrs. Kamprung chicken just became a mom....again....The chicks are like little golfballs with legs
Soo cute and adorable.I didnt know chicks are that small..



All mothers are very, very caring.


Here the chicks are hiding under their mother to rest and keep warm..


We called him spotty as u can see he has a lot of spots.He also got a fiery red length of feathers
on his back mixed with a dark sea blue and green


Here's the other which is far more colourful than spotty. No name has a more cleaner and organised colours like a dark blue chest and his back is a darkish fiery red mixed with purple
orange and blue



Both the cockarals have green tails with white spruting at the base. Spotty has a longer
tail than no name


Here's the nest where the hen took care of the eggs


The cocks are having a staring competiton..



The chicks need to stay under mom to keep warm cuz they cant keep warm themselves



wha..What are you doing up there, get down here right now. You know chickens dont fly

The end
until my mid year exam finishes in 2 more freaking weeks....